Making the First Move

I’m pretty sure everyone who has ever read my blog knows that I’m a huge fan of the dating app Bumble (I’m still waiting for my paid ambassador position, y’all...), but I think that some people don’t always understand is WHY I’m such a huge fan. My reasoning behind liking Bumble is that it gives women the chance to make the first move (in heterosexual relationships/interactions on the app). 

vía Bumble’s Instagram

vía Bumble’s Instagram

I’m a fan of Bumble because it trains/forced women to make the first move- something that tends to be actively discouraged in our society. I define it this way: I get to go after what/who I want, when I want, and on my terms. I get to shape the start of our conversation, which is a complete game changer in online dating, which is a space where women are inundated with overtly sexual and crude messages off the bar. Having the chance to shape the conversation and then all further interactions just from sending that first message is a HUGE confidence boost for me.  

I like being able to take charge in my relationships. I’m not exactly known for being demure, so giving me a chance to start a conversation on my terms is something that I will jump at the chance for. I think that creating a space in which women create their own space and chase after who and what they want creates for a more intentional and less overtly crude online dating experience. It’s a little bit of a thrill as well, putting yourself out there in an almost vulnerable setting where there is a possibility of getting rejected

Since I’ve started using Bumble, which I think I’m going on... almost 2.5 years as a user, I’ve noticed that it’s actually emboldened me to make the first move in more than just Bumble’s sphere. On other dating apps, and in person, I’ve started being the one who initiates conversation. It allows me to feel more confident in my dating choices because I’m taking charge- not waiting for someone to come talk to me. I’m a fan of encouraging everyone to make a move and chase after what they want- it’s your life, you should go after who you want! 

 

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Lifestyle, DatingMolly Schwartz