Hello hello my loves! Hope your Thursday is fabulous! I'm very excited for this weekend as one of my best friends from home is coming to visit and I get to spend a good part of the weekend catching up with her! I hope everyone else's weekends are as grand as I think mine will be!
I wanted to share a little bit of... I guess what could be called wisdom. Anyone who has met me, pretty much off the bat will realize that I am someone who fully believes in being confident in yourself. I'm a big believer in myself and others and the capabilities that we hold within ourselves. Sometimes people will say I'm a little overconfident, not that I'm conceited, but that I think I can handle more than I actually can. I'll just say this is one of a few character flaws ;)
That being said, I think that for people around my age, especially women, this is a very insecure time, where it's difficult to find that confidence that everyone else seems to have. Here's the secret- A lot of people are good at faking their own confidence. Even yours truly included. Now don't get me wrong, I think I can handle 95% of what life throws at me and I think I'm a pretty amazing human. This doesn't mean that there aren't days where I feel like a "trash bag", to quote a close friend of mine, but I still give off the air of having my life together. On the days where all you feel like you can handle is staying in bed, and you're not feeling too hot about yourself, here are my tips for giving yourself a confidence boost, both small things and big things!
1) Dress in something that makes you feel badass.
I don't care what it is, whether it's great fitting jeans, or your comfiest sweats. Whatever it is that you feel most YOU in, put that on. If you like to do your hair and makeup, go for it! Have some you time and give yourself time to have fun with it. When I'm feeling rough, I get up a little earlier and give myself time to play with my makeup and outfit until I feel like I can take on anything.
2) Move it.
I'm personally big into dancing as a confidence boost, but if you're a runner or a biker, go for that! I like to blast my favorite music and get a little dance party going. As Elle Woods says, "Exercise gives you endorphins and endorphins make people happy!" So just move around and wiggle about just enough to get your heart rate up and some good vibes going!
3) Learn to kick butt - literally.
The best thing I've done in college for my self confidence is actually take a self defense class. It sounds a little crazy, but knowing that I can comfortably throw a punch or defend myself if need be makes me stand a little taller. It's a comfort knowing that you can rely on yourself for something as important as safety, and it's important to be able to defend yourself.
1) Put people/others first.
This may seem counter intuitive, but it's something that always helps me when I feel not so good about what I do. Talking to someone about their bad day, or hashing out a rough situation with a friend who needs advice is something that you'd probably want to do as a supportive and loving friend, but after this conversation, you'll also feel really good that you helped someone! I'm a big believer in putting people first (sometimes to a point where I forget to take care of myself), but part of the reason I feel so confident is because I know that I can comfortably say that my friends and peers can rely on me when things are good or bad. Knowing that I'm a support for others helps me remember that I can handle myself too.
2) Remember that you're human- and humans make mistakes.
Let's say you're feeling down on yourself because of a screwup, that might have been your fault. This is a time where your self confidence isn't going to be the highest. That being said, sit down and ask yourself, is this going to matter in 24 hours? 2 weeks? A month? A year? Chances are, it won't. People will move on to other things and other problems. You're a human and we're not perfect - you're allowed to make mistakes.
3) Think long and hard about your strengths and successes.
Okay, maybe you really just screwed up a math exam. Maybe you got your first B/C/ D *insert grade here*. Yeah, it sucks to have that punch in the gut feeling of- what just happened? Where did this come from? Give yourself a second, breathe and then think about- hey, maybe you're not the best at math (or maybe this test was on a bad day for you, or maybe you didn't study well). But, while math isn't your strong suit, writing totally is! If you focus on the positive, you'll feel a little more peppy about going forward.
I have a lot of tips on how to be confident in general, but these are the ones I immediately run to when I'm having a down on myself day. If you're looking for some quick and easy tips for how to boost confidence, see below!
1) Call up a good friend. Talk about something GREAT that you did recently.
2) Teach someone something that you know well.
3) Reach out to someone you've wanted to get to know.
4) Ask for help. Everyone struggles with confidence and everyone is willing to help the people around them with outstretched hands.
5) Write down how you're feeling for 5-10 minutes. Then turn over the paper, close the notebook and zone out. Go watch TV for a bit and come back to the paper when you feel clear headed.
6) Take a nap!
7) Get yourself a little treat to boost your mood! Get your favorite cup of coffee!
8) Talk to someone younger than you who's looked up to you.
9) Give someone some advice. Nothing is better than feeling like an expert!
10) Focus on your strengths and successes!
Hope this helped y'all in the midst of our semesters and midterms. I know I've had my low confidence days where I needed a boost of help. Have a fabulous Thursday!